Purchased an ungodly amount of plastic Elmo-ware sure to hasten the demise of the planet and choke the Pacific Gyre beginning July 27 th.
Made a donation to offset Liberal Guilt associated with Elmo-ware death to sea creatures.
Actively pursued the explosion of ToysRUs and Fisher Price in our home.
Dyed my Nightmare on Elm Street-esque grey streak that has developed this year as I feel it is inappropriate to celebrate the culmination of Max's first year looking as though Freddy Kruger has scared the bejeezuz outta me. (even if he did.)
Had half the skin on my face 'dermabraded' read: used a sander on my face in a vain (both meanings of the word, utter vanity and totally for naught) attempt to appear as if I have slept 1 of the 365 days since Baby Max arrived.
Baked Elmo's head in the form of a cake.
Begged, pleaded and prayed for Elmo's head to come out of the pan in one Elmo shaped piece.
Actually danced around the kitchen when Elmo's head was successfully released from the pan.
Laughed at how honest to God pleased and proud of myself I was from this achievement.
Used all those fantastic make up skills learned from all my years of theatre to painstakingly turn Elmo from blank cake to frosty monster!
Thanked God that frosting, like make up, is forgiving.
Purchased a new outfit for me to wear to the party....yeah I know. Max doesn't care.
New lip gloss may have snuck in there too.
I did resist the shoes....
Giggled as my husband put together the new play set for Max, and so it begins...
Wondered what on earth we will get him for Christmas! Surely we've purchased everything there is to get...
Oh! Looked at Fisher Price catalog and PBK, now have a new list for Christmas!
Realized happily how my priorities have changed since Baby Max has been born.
Decorated the house
Wished I could do more...
Wished for another year as happy and healthy as this one.
Held him close, and let him go as he takes his first wobbly steps towards two.
I'm a new mom, grappling with the loss of my fabulosity but loving my new identity. Pied piper of stray cats, commedienne, actress, currently exploring the fashion forwardness of baby spit up and a tiara. I can't wait to be very rich so I can have a butler to serve me coffee in bed first thing in the morning...and not to speak to me till I've had it.
Tiny Dancer, Sock Monkey Snuggler, iPhone App deleter and the absolute love of my life.
The Husband - Zach
The Lying Liar Who Lies, teller of tall tales, and yeah...also the love of my life.
The Sister - Dub
A.K.A. Heather. BFF since age 3, mom to nephew Zu. Goddess
The Best Friend - Janice
Star of the upcoming feature What Would Janice Do. She's funny, snarky and you want her on your side. Trust me. Best friends since college, she is mom to Godson Ben.
Need to contact me?
Got something to say but don't want to leave a comment? A book or product to be reviewed?
All of this is mine. Copyrighted, get it? Every word, every picture. If you want something,just ask. I'm pretty generous, but steal something like a picture of my baby I'll sick my dog on ya. He's big and mean! Ok, not really. He's small and yappy and has anxiety which is why he's on Prozac. But my neighbors have a big mean Dobie and I will borrow him and sick him on ya and he'll bite your bum. So there.
1 comment:
So sweet. Great post. Happy 1st to Mr. Max.
Post a Comment