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Thursday, April 30, 2009

Has anybody seen my baby?


He's been switched somehow. Invasion of the body snatchers! Somehow my sweet cuddly easy going little monkey has been replaced with a doppleganger. An angry, unhappy, little bugger. My baby coos and giggles and claps, this tiny tyrant screams and wails, his head rolls back and he uses my body as a punching bag and when I feed him he uses me as a chew and pull toy. Ouch!

I know the culprit, I know just who is responsible. It's the evil Teething Monster and he has taken up residence in my baby. So far teething, in our house anyway, is tantamount to (dare I say it) possession. I'm using the teething holy trinity per my doctor's advice; ice, baby Anbesol and baby Tylenol and they are barely working.

Max's great Aunt works in a pharmacy in a little town in Ohio. The Pharmacist there inherited it from his father, who inherited it from his father. That family has owned and operated it for over 100 years and on display they have all of these old medicine bottles. He's a bit of a chatter and he loves to show them off. The last time we were there I was very pregnant and he brought down a big old bottle that said "Morphine, for the treatment of teething babies".

I kid you not.

He told us they would just rub a little on the gums and the babies would be happy as clams and sleep like,well, not babies but exhausted mommies.


Now, I'm not interested in getting my little bugger on Morphine! You should have seen the panic attack I had the very first time we gave him gas drops. I was certain that I'd overdosed him. Ofcourse I hadn't and he was just fine, but it's such an add feeling giving your little one any kind of medicine.

So far one little tooth has made it's razor sharp way into the world and we are waiting on at least one more. My poor kidlet does not know what to do with himself. Bouncer? Nope. Snuggle? Nope. Nap? Hell no! Kick and wiggle? Not interested. Dora the Explorer? Well...maybe. He loves him some Dora.

I wish I had a magic medicine that would ease his pain without it being morphine. Just the thought that was done both cracks me up and horrifies me (They also had liquid cocaine for women with menstrual 'issues' read:pms). I miss my baby, and watching him be so miserable is totally miserable for me. Here's hoping that new tooth breaks through today and Sweet Baby Max can have a little rest...

1 comment:

CandiceR said...

lol ya there is no "humane" way to ease their pain. Nate popped an eye tooth not to long ago and - wow - i was zombified for about a week - my daughter always takes advantage of me when I'm in zombie mode so she decided to colour ALL OVER her bedroom walls that week - good times. I confess to giving Nate some easter chocolate to cheer him up - I know - bad eh?