How lovely. I woke early and dressed, I even curled my hair, put on a new outfit and my favorite cockroach stomping boots! But alas the best laid plans were not to be.
Here at the American Dream I've been sleeping down stairs in the crazy awesome apartment and since TTOTT (The Teller of Tall Tales) (Do we like TTOTT? I'm trying it out...) has to get up early for work, and let's face it he may be sweet and funny but he is not the quietest man in the land, he's been crashing upstairs in his childhood bedroom.
It's so ideal.
Plus the little league baseball trophies are way sexy.
By the time I got upstairs the poor dude was folded over in extreme pain. And just like that we were off to the E.R. Let me just say, if you need a trip to urgent care may I suggest that you schedule it for 7 a.m. on a Sunday. We were seen in a flash! I'm still pondering why hospitals must be kept at such a frigid temperature. I think my toes are still frozen, it was Cullen cold in there. Poor TTOTT (Yay? Nay? I dunno..) has kidney stones before so it was no shock what it was, but I do have to say that I haven't really seen him in this much pain before. It sucked hardcore.
Luckily our lovely nurse quickly administered the phine. Ah, yes. Morphine. If you all ever have the opportunity to visit TTOTT whilst he is all warm and fuzzy from the phine, I highly- HIGHLY- suggest it. (although let's hope today was the final time he has it)
You'll experience a little thing we call THE ZACH SHOW.
He gets all silly, smiley, and just 'on' there is no other word for it. He is 'ON'.
Zach has earned his monikers earnestly but he truly is not a braggart. He'll mention my accomplishments far quicker than his own.
It's just a good thing I wasn't imbibing any beverages as the nurse gave him a dose of the phine, he got a big smile on his quickly flushing face turned to her and said
"You might have seen me on television!"
It was shortly after that our nurse betrayed all woman kind by saying a man having kidney stones was worse that a woman giving birth.
But TTOTT was soooooooooooooooooooooper stoned at that point so he just giggled and then when the nurse left he told me that babies trump kidney stones. I say well done young man, and have another hit!
He's gonna be fine, we are home now. We stopped for bagels and donuts on the way home and I have a new lover- a honey dipped donut. I proclaim my undying love for thee!
The man is resting now, no more morphine but he's got a nice prescription of Vicodin to see him through the next few days. Here's hoping he is on the road to 'delivering' soon.
I won't be getting a nursery ready though. Ew.